My story is no different than any other girl or woman out there. To say, “Ever since I can remember, I have had issues with my body,” seems, unfortunately, like a rite of passage. However, it seems my relationship with my body has been confronted more intensely than ever since we have entered quarantine. I have attempted to write about this relationship in the past, but I have never really had the words. Even now, I don’t know how this will translate, but I hope to emphasize one point: This ‘relationship’ has been nothing but toxic and I’m done with it.
When I was in college, I had what I would consider ‘my best body.’ I was part of a competitive dance team, I used my fear of the Freshman 15 to establish a regular workout routine, and overall, I was just much more mobile because I was walking and biking everywhere (yes, even in L.A.). But I still felt negatively towards my body because 1. I never felt confident in my skin or body to begin with, and 2. I was surrounded by white sorority girls in one of the most superficial, Euro-centric, image-obsessed cities in the world. I would be lying if I said my desire to lose weight stemmed from seeing other thin women of color because it was really to get the desirable white, skinny body type that all the boys on campus (ESPECIALLY black, male student athletes) were fawning over. I always felt I could lose weight and when I graduated, I maintained this workout routine which was manageable since I was unemployed. Once I started my first full-time job though, this whole routine plummeted and started the most unhealthy relationship I have ever had with my body.
Today’s post is simply a reminder to everyone to enjoy all parts of your life–the good and the bad. It is a dark time that we are all experiencing for various reasons. It is so easy to wallow in this darkness and expect someone to pull us out. While we will be experiencing gradual change over the next however many months (maybe years), we cannot resign our efforts. We especially cannot press pause on life. This absolutely is not a declaration for people to start living their lives ‘as normal as possible’ and throw caution to the wind with a global pandemic happening. Instead, see it as a reminder of having good health and having a fulfilling life, however you define it. Continue reading “A Gentle Reminder”→
Three years ago, I was exploring Boston with my friend, Brad.
Two years ago, I was a couple of days out from my family trip to LA.
Last year, I was preparing for my trip to Cabarete in the Dominican Republic with my friend, Ilse.
In a couple of weeks, I would have been on my way to London again on a two-week trip with the plan of country-hopping in Europe. As if I don’t already spend all of my free time thinking about traveling, these memories have hit me harder than I could have imagined. Continue reading “Travel Withdrawals”→
Hey, everyone!! It’s been a while since we last spoke, literally and figuratively. Since the last couple of posts, a lot has been going on that has affected all of us. Some of it good, some of it bad, but all of it needed (to some degree). My last post was on June 3rd–even though I can assume that people expected me to write about the Black Lives Matter movement, I just did not have the words, the emotional stability, or the energy. Quite frankly, I still don’t. Writing my last post was not an intentional decision to detract from conversations going on, but I did want to give spotlight to that virtual event in real time. A lot more time has passed and I feel I can at least write something more…coherent. Continue reading “Keep Going”→