Travel Withdrawals

The past few days, I have been reminded through social media of memories that took place at this exact same time: five years ago, I was in San Francisco for the first time.
SF
Four years ago, I was finishing up my internship abroad in London.
greenwich
Three years ago, I was exploring Boston with my friend, Brad.
boston
Two years ago, I was a couple of days out from my family trip to LA.
la
Last year, I was preparing for my trip to Cabarete in the Dominican Republic with my friend, Ilse.
DR
In a couple of weeks, I would have been on my way to London again on a two-week trip with the plan of country-hopping in Europe. As if I don’t already spend all of my free time thinking about traveling, these memories have hit me harder than I could have imagined. Continue reading “Travel Withdrawals”

Keep Going

Keep Going

Hey, everyone!! It’s been a while since we last spoke, literally and figuratively. Since the last couple of posts, a lot has been going on that has affected all of us. Some of it good, some of it bad, but all of it needed (to some degree). My last post was on June 3rd–even though I can assume that people expected me to write about the Black Lives Matter movement, I just did not have the words, the emotional stability, or the energy. Quite frankly, I still don’t. Writing my last post was not an intentional decision to detract from conversations going on, but I did want to give spotlight to that virtual event in real time. A lot more time has passed and I feel I can at least write something more…coherent.
Continue reading “Keep Going”

The Rollercoaster

Does anyone feel like they are currently on a never-ending rollercoaster? Not in the fun way, but in the I-have-to-ride-this-ride-over-and-over-because-a-small-family-member-is-obsessed-with-it-but-I’m-getting-sick-and-I-want-off-immediately. Well, obviously, I wouldn’t classify what we are all going through at the moment as a result of someone being “obsessed” and “enjoying” the global pandemic because what we are doing is of the utmost importance and contributes to the safety of all of us. But what I mean is I feel like my mental state is in a constant up and down and loopty-loop of trying to remain positive and feeling absolutely helpless. It seems I go days feeling pretty good, feeling blessed and grateful that I and my family and friends are safe, feeling okay with the fact that I am working from home and that my day-to-day life has not shifted that much in the grand scheme. This past week, however, I have had an onslaught of bad days of feeling what I can only describe as melancholy: a feeling of pensive sadness, typically with no obvious cause.

Even when I was feeling productive and pushing through the overwhelming pull to get in bed, I was still doing those tasks just because I needed or wanted to. It was purely just to get them done because I knew I would feel worse later if I didn’t. It really took until this weekend to snap back into it and reflect on where I am mentally with the current climate. Two weeks ago, I posted a video about the ways I am protecting my mental space during this time. I continue to do these things, but I still feel at a standstill. Maybe it’s the fact that I am naturally a planned person, or that each day we are getting closer and closer to the trip I had to cancel that I’d been planning for nearly six months, but the ability to not be able to plan for the immediate future was weighing on me. I know, I know…this is everyone’s current reality, but I have to remind myself that that does not make my feelings any less valid.

Continue reading “The Rollercoaster”

The September Issue

The September Issue

The September issue is the magazine world’s equivalent of January, its very own new year… it’s the magazine edition that is the biggest, the most influential and the one with the strongest fashion pull. The autumn/winter season always has more influence than spring/summer – September spells the end of summer. – Ella Alexander, Glamour UK Magazine, 2016

As fashion month comes to close and I mourn all the fashion weeks I have yet to be a guest at, I revel in the fact that it is finally fall. To start, I guess I should say I have never really been a summer girl to begin with: it’s hot, everywhere is crowded, and travel is expensive. I also feel at my absolute worst in summer as I detailed in a very personal post around this time last year. Unfortunately, it was no different this year where I found myself experiencing those all too familiar feelings and, more intensely, asking myself, “What am I doing with my life?”

Continue reading “The September Issue”